It has been
so long since I have written on my blog. We have been very busy the last couple
of months. DD has been AWOL for the most part. We both know it, realize it,
have spoke about it, are trying to get everything where it needs to be for us.
Life does
seem to sometimes override what you truly need, want and/or desire. Luckily we
both know what has caused the absence and are trying to get all back on track,
which can be a little difficult when it has been mostly absent.
We have had
many functions this time of year, we have had lots of company, and both of our
jobs have been extremely busy. That in turn has made DD on & off again
which is not good for me at all.
I know I am
loved, cherished and even adored without DD, but I am so much better with it
actively consistently practiced. (It has not been totalIy absent BTW)but the on
& off again will cause me to get off kilter a little without it, get in my
own mind, do my own thing, and as Lee likes to say I tend to over think.
We both have
spoke much about this the last few days and are working on trying to get
everything back to our “normal”. I am a little concerned since he is leaving
again at the end of the week. When he is gone is when I can really lose my mind
a little bit, but I did do great last time. So hopefully I will again.
I know we
all have those times when “real life” interferes with our own real life. I need
to remember we have each other. “I have him”, just like “He has me”. We will
get our “normal” back, because honestly we both know we cannot go back to the “OLD
normal”, not even an option for us.
It's tough. We want and need them around so much more now. I totally understand. I'll be around when you're going crazy.
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean. Summer is a crazy time for us - and last year Dd was, well awful- or rather our relationship part of it anyway. It is comforting to know that you are loved and cherished, because sometimes we really do have to hold on to that in order to try to continue to submit. The on and off thing sends me all over the map too. The absence of Dd at times makes me feel a sense of rejection even though sometimes I understand the reasoning behind it.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, not that it helps tons but know you aren't alone with these feelings.